Starting things off right

So last week I announced that I was going to start eating paleo 100% for 30 days starting today. I did start off right, I had a boiled egg and a banana for breakfast. NAILED IT. But then as I was looking around the house for a snack (because I knew a banana and an egg were not going to get to lunch time) I went to my cabinets and got out a Luna protein bar.  They are gluten free but I have NO idea of they are really considered Paleo.  So at break today I thought I would research Paleo a little bit more. And as I was researching it, I realized that Paleo really isn't ONE SET OF RULES.  It seems like there are A LOT of variations of it.

I got a little frustrated but then a lot of the websites kept talking about this WHOLE 30 diet.  And so I looked some stuff up on that and decided that is probably where I need to start.  The main idea behind Paleo is to "Eat whole, unprocessed, nutrient-dense, nourishing foods. Prioritize grass fed and pastured meats and eggs, wild-caught seafood, and vegetables. Enjoy fruit, nuts, and seeds in moderation." That quote is from Nom Nom Paleo's website.  You can find that Here.  But then there is this grey area around cheese, potatoes, sweets, dairy, etc. And the reason those are so grey is because some people like to fit them into their diet and it works out GREAT, but then other people can't digest dairy so they don't include that in their diet. So there is no ONE set of guidelines when it comes to the grey area foods.  But in that same website she suggested starting off with the Whole 30 diet. It is more strict, but it helps you figure out what foods fit your body best.  And to do that, you start off by eliminating all of the grey area foods. So that is what I am going to do. I will start off with the Whole 30 for 30 days and then I will revaluate things. I honestly think I process dairy pretty well, but I want to give my body a chance to really get back to basics before I jump to any conclusions and who knows maybe after 30 days my body won't want dairy any more.

I wanted to give you an update on what is going because I felt like I let people down when I had that protein bar because I wasn't 100% sure if it was paleo or not. I went to the Library over lunch and got a book over the WHOLE 30 and I'm hoping to get a better idea of what the heck I am doing. So I may have to be a "Half ass paleo dieter" until I can get a better idea of what I need to get this thing started. So I am hoping that by Wednesday of this week I will be able to get this thing jump started or if I was a typical person I would start May 1st. NAH, I'm not a typical person. So probably Wednesday or Friday I will have some recipes for you all or at least a weeks worth of menu ideas.

Also, we had a GREAT Easter weekend. I thoroughly enjoyed this years Easter.  I have to say, being a mom makes the holidays that much better.  I LOVE LOVE LOVE watching R hunt for Easter eggs and enjoy the holiday festivities.  He really liked decorating the eggs.

 

 

 

I figured he would throw a HUGE fit about the ears, but he actually liked them.

 

 

And this one is my FAVORITE.  These two melt my heart every time.

 

The one thing I love about R is that he is a LOVER.  He honestly cares about people and animals. He can be such a sweetie.

 

But the frosting on the cake was when R said "We had a great day," to his grandma. Just out of the blue that is what he said. I am glad between me, his dad, grandparents, great grandparents and cousins we can give him a GREAT day.

 

 

How was your Easter??

 

Anyone want to join me in the Whole 30?? Come on, someone has to want to. LOL

Confession time! (not a religious post)

So yesterday I was on my way back to work from lunch (which was a VERY healthy chicken salad from the salad bar at the grocery store) and it dawned on me.  I half ASS things.  I totally do.  I half assed my half marathon. HAHAHA that is kinda of funny, maybe if I do a full marathon I won't HALF ass it. LOL okay enough of that.

I totally half ass everything. From cleaning house to my workouts. I do what is JUST enough to get me by.  And I'm tired of it. What made me think of this?? Well after eating my super healthy salad I needed to buy some groceries like eggs and bananas, all healthy, but then at the check out lane there was a stupid display of Reese's peanut butter eggs and they were buy 2 get ONE free. All Easter Season I have only bought one at a time, but this time I thought "Oh crap Easter is this weekend and they will ALL BE GONE!" I had a panic attack and bought 3.  So I thought, well I can eat one.  But then one lead to two and then THREE. Yep I ate ALL three of them in a matter of 2-3 hours. I felt horrible afterwards of course.  And with the realization of how I half ass things, I decided that I am diving in, HEAD first, into Paleo.  There it is, I am committing myself for 30 days to eating healthy and ONLY paleo. IF I don't, I know I will half ass my diet for the REST of my life.

So starting on Monday, I will be only eating things that are Paleo friendly. I have dabbled with it during the last few weeks, but the dabbling is OVER. I'm done being a half asser. I am going to do this for a month and see how it goes. If after a month I feel healthier and better then I will continue with it, but if I feel like it isn't for me then I will make adjustments.

I have goals and with those goals comes GREAT responsibilities. CRAP, that is Spiderman, not me. But seriously if I want to reach my goals then I have to do EVERYTHING possible to make sure I achieve those goals. I loved the feeling of finishing my half marathon and I want that feeling again. I want to REACH my goals. So last night I started a vision board and this idea came from Val at Fabulous Chick Gets Fit.  So last night I made a new board on Pinterest and really focused on what I WANTED. Here is some of what I came up with:

Look at how muscular she is and strong she is. I may NEVER look like her, but I want to be as STRONG as I can be.

 

I want to be able to do ONE of these, it is called a muscle up.  And it is much harder than it looks.  To be honest, I struggle with any move we do on the rings, they are so foreign to me.

 

I think this one explains it self.

 

I started this board because I wanted something visual for the days when I am struggling and it has already helped.  This morning at Crossfit I was struggling, it was a VERY hard workout for me.  I struggled with the rings and then doing some headstand things.  I felt like an idiot (because to be honest, everyone else was doing these moves A LOT better than me), but then I thought of these things and it got me through the work out.  I sweated more than I have ever sweat during a workout, but boy did I feel GREAT when I was done. But there was a point where I wanted to give up and say, "enough is enough." But then the first picture popped into my head and I told myself "I am never going to get stronger if I give up now." So I kept going. The trainer knew I was struggling and he helped me and in the end, he said "You did a great job, you pushed through the hard stuff, that is what counts." SO TRUE. I was proud of myself when I left the "box" this morning (a box is a crossfit gym). I was FREAKING wiped out, but I was proud of myself. I knew I gave it everything I had. And isn't that the point to all of this.

 

My other goal is to run another half marathon under 2:15 and I think that is very possible. I need to pin some more running stuff, but I like this one.

I have never been a person to do this, I feel like I always take baby steps to get there. But come Monday I am going to become this person.

 

I know this one, but I sometimes I need a reminder:

 



 

 

So come Monday, you can basically call me the "Paleo girl" or you can come up with something much cooler. I will try to post a menu of what I plan on eating on my next post. My hope is that either tomorrow or Sunday I will go grocery shopping and before I go shopping that I have a weeks worth of meals that I want to make.

 

Okay enough of the serious talk, I also pinned some funny shit yesterday too.

I really want to do this to someone. I LOVE that commercial. Mostly because I can see myself being that lady in that exact robe. HAHAHA.

 

TRUE STORY.

 

If you see a good example of this, take a pic and send it to me or tag me in the post.  This just cracks me up.

 

 

Okay that is all I got for you folks.  See you on Monday.  Have a Hoppy Easter. Yeah, I am lame like that.

 

What are your goals for this spring/summer.  I seriously want to know. It could be to lose 5-10 pounds, maybe it is to run a 5k or half marathon. Let me in on your dirty little secret (I mean fitness goals, I don't want to know the other stuff!!).

 



 

 



What I learned....

I wasn't sure what title to use on this post because I wanted to say, "What I learned while running a half marathon" but it seems like some of the lessons I learned were while I trained for the marathon too. So I will just leave it at "what I learned"

1.) I learned that running is completely a mental game. Okay, not 100%.  It seemed like once I ran 6 miles at once, the rest of the long distance runs weren't that bad as long as my head was in the game. Also, there are times when you want to stop, not because your legs are tired, or your breathing hard, but because you just WANT to stop.  That is where the mental part comes in, at that point you have to say, Do I NEED to stop? If the answer is no, then you need to keep pushing through it. 

2.) You will have bad days. Not every run is going to be your BEST run.  You are going to HATE it on some days and that is where the mental part comes in too.  Just because you don't feel like running or your heart isn't in it, doesn't mean you get to stop or not run. But don't let those bad days steer you away from running because more than likely the next run will be AMAZING!

3.) ANYONE CAN RUN A HALF MARATHON!! If I can run a half marathon, then anyone can run a half marathon. Yep you read that right, I honestly believe with training that anyone can run a half marathon.  The key is that you train.  Most people can't just show up the day of a race and run 13.1 miles (although I bet there are some who can do that, those people SUCK). If you give yourself 12 weeks or more, then anyone can run a half a marathon. A little determination (okay some days it take A LOT of determination) and some running shoes and you will be running a half marathon too! I promise!

4.) Don't just run on a dirt and gravel roads when the race is mostly on pavement. I thought running on the dirt roads would help me build muscle in my legs that I wouldn't get if I ran on cement/side walks.  But on race day, what I learned is that it was pretty hard on my legs, they weren't use to pavement. AHHHH. Yeah I should have ran on booth pavement and dirt roads.

5.) Don't eat a greasy hamburger before the race. I wish I would have eaten something lighter or more protein/carb base.  I don't think spaghetti or some pasta dish is what I needed (they say you should actually start carb loading a few days before the race, the night before is too late!). Not sure what I would eat instead, but I'm telling you that I won't eat a greasy hamburger and French fries again before the race. The WHOLE time before the race I kept thinking I NEEDED to go to the bathroom, and I'm not talking about number 1!! Maybe it was my nerves, but I think that greasy hamburger had something to do with it.

6.) Test out your playlist BEFORE the race.  There were some songs that I wish I would have heard, but they never made it. And then other ones that were on there and they just annoyed me. So the next time I will have them in a particular order.

7.) Get the right gear well before the race. I told you I bought my running pack and gel shots, but I wish I would have bought them earlier. Because I bought the pack because I wanted it to hold my gel shots, but I wish I would have played around with those BEFORE the race.  I wasn't really sure when to take those shots.  Also, if I had used the pack before the race then I would have realized that it would not solve my headphone wire problem like I thought it would. UGH. Those wires just pissed me off. So next time I will either have a set of Bluetooth headphones or I will take my wires to my shirt so they don't move around on me. (sorry I know that is a small complaint, but seriously that wire just drove me crazy almost the WHOLE way.)

I probably looked like this every time I had to adjust my headphone wires. People were probably scared of me.

 

8.) Along with the gear, I should have bought new shoes before the race.  Those are the shoes I ran my 5K in last year and I have used them A LOT.  The last long run before the race I noticed the bottoms of my feet hurt, but I didn't want to run the race in new shoes. Well after my race the bottoms of my feet really hurt. I wish I would have bought new shoes a couple of weeks before the race.  Believe me, I got the money out of my old ones and I'm pretty darn sure I will out of my next ones. I just need to remind myself of that when it comes time to buy them. (I'm horrible about saying I'm going to buy something and then I don't. Then I end up writing a post about things I regret or learned.)

9.) I wish I would have run 13.1 miles before the race.  A LOT of the training programs you see will say that you only need to run 10 miles and that adrenaline (or something) will push you those next 3 miles come race day.  Well I think that is crap.  By the time my next race in here, I will have ran 13.1 miles beforehand. I know that running only 10 miles for some people works, but not this girl.  Those last 3 miles were BRUTAL. I was tired; my hips started to hurt; I was mentally exhausted; and the idea of running 3 more miles seemed impossible.  I think it was more mental because I had NEVER ran 13.1 miles and at that moment it felt like it was too far away. I stopped to walk more on those last 3 miles than I did at any other part of the race.

10.) Train HARD! You don't want to look back and say "I wish I would have trained harder." And that is exactly what I thought during the race and afterwards. At the beginning I was running during the week and then I stopped. I hated running on the treadmill, but I really didn't have time to run outside either or the weather wouldn't cooperate. But this next time, I will run on that horrible treadmill during the week if I have to. But I will also keep up the weight lifting aka Crossfit. Basically I will push it harder during the week workouts and not just rely on my long distance runs during the weekend.

I have used this one before, but I think it still applies.

 

All in all, it was an alright race.  I will do it again, mark my words.  I am already looking at some this fall. I set a goal and I achieved that goal. I CROSSED THAT FINISH LINE.  Before I got married I ran to loose weight and I thought I wanted to run a half marathon, that was over 8 years ago.  That was the beginning of the dream. Now the dream is to keep going and to keep getting stronger and better.

These are the official race result. I ran 13.1 mile in 2 hours 29 minutes and 37 second. And I came in 98th place.

See.  I made it under 2:30!!! BARELY, but I made it. And I didn't come in LAST!

 

I want to run another Half Marathon under 2:15 and I think that is doable. Let's just hope it doesn't take another 8 years!! :)

Here is an extra ecard, I just thought it was funny.

What are you plans for this spring/summer?? Are you running any races??

Half Marathon recap

First off let me start with thanking all the people who text me, called me, facebooked, and instagramed me on Saturday, YOU. ARE. AMAZING. I felt incredibly loved and supported. I couldn't ask for better family and friends. I got words of encouragement from family members (close and far), friends (that I recently hang out and from high school), and from people who I have NEVER met in person. I was felt so humbled to get messages from people that I follow, that I look up to. Some from people who are running their 10 half marathon to the people who are training for their first half marathon. SO THANK YOU TO ALL! I think that might be the theme of this post! Because I can't say it enough.

So Friday I woke up (late, my alarm forgot to set itself the night before and wake me up!!) and I felt pretty rested. Ran around like a wild woman, because we were ALL running late.  If I wake up late that means the whole family is late. Got to work and then the butterflies started to kick in. At lunch time I posted my play list post and then I started to get real nervous or excited, I'm not really sure which one it was. I basically couldn't concentrate on work and I couldn't wait until 5:00 because that meant I could totally focus on what I needed to do before the race.

Once 5:00 hit, I was in half marathon mode. I picked up R and took him to his grandma's house so I could drive to Abilene (20 minutes away) to get my race packet and do some last minute shopping. The packet pick up went pretty darn smoothly, they had pizza too which Jed thoroughly enjoyed, I passed.

Then we went to have my pre-race meal and I choose to have a hamburger at a brewery here in town and a beer.

I knew a beer would calm me down and it did until I got home. The last minute shopping included these items:

I will say that I am happy with my purchases.  The next thing I will buy are Bluetooth headphones, the cables annoy the holiness right out of me. If you are wondering about these waste band thing, they are pretty awesome.  It DID NOT MOVE UNLESS I MOVED IT. It was pretty awesome. But you won't make a fashion statement with it on, I'm sure I looked like I had a huge pump on my side, but A LOT of people had packs and so I'm assuming most people knew what it was!

So then once we got home, all I needed to do was lay out my clothes for the next day.

And at the point, all I needed to do was sleep. It was after 10:00 pm and I thought falling asleep would be pretty darn easy.  WRONG.  I barely got any sleep the night before.  I know I saw 1:00 AM and after that I knew I was in for a long run.

So when my alarm hit 4:55 a.m. I finally decided to get up and get ready.  I wasn't really tired, but my adrenaline was kicking in and I knew by race time the fatigue would set in. But what can you do??

So I made my breakfast - scrambled eggs and chicken sausage. Took a quick selfie. LOL and checked the weather. Windy, but warm. The warmth I was happy about, but the wind I knew would make things a little more difficult which at this point I didn't need. And I said good bye to my favorite dog in the world, Sahara.  She got up to see me off.  Oh who am I kidding, she wanted an early breakfast.  My guess she was hoping that her dad would feed her another breakfast once he got up. LOL

I headed to Abilene with no problems, I knew I would have enough time to get a parking spot and get settled. As I was driving there I started to think about everything and tears started to well up. On March 30th of last year was my FIRST 5K and a little over a year later I was on my way to my first half marathon.  What a year! I honestly never thought I would actually run a half marathon. It was something I always thought about, but I really didn't think I had it in me to complete it. So as these thoughts came to me, I began to tear up. Could I really be driving to my first half marathon?? WOW, I am!

Then I get there and a whole another sort of emotions hit me. CRAP, I have to run 13.1 miles. I take a few minutes to look around and see my fellow runners and it is amazing.  They ranged from super fit people to people who are heavier than me (the latter makes me realize how awesome being a runner is!). So the nerves are really kicking in and I find myself wanting to cry and I'm not really sure why.  Is it because I'm by myself, or that I have to run 13.1 miles, or is because I finally accepted the fact that I AM A RUNNER.  I deserve to be with these people!!

I read this text message before the race. I literally almost lost it. For the people I love to call me a runner, it meant the world to me. I feel so bless to be surrounded by these AWESOME people. 

We line up and we talk amongst ourselves.  You can feel everyone's excitement and nervousness.  I LOVE that feeling. It is that feeling that has kept me playing sports and running. There is just something special in the air.  Then the gun goes off and there is no turning back. I start to run telling myself to take it slow and steady. DO NOT RUSH YOURSELF.  You have 13 miles to run, take it EASY. And I did.

I am getting close to the one mile marker and I see a friend on the side of the road with her baby and I about lose it. The tears are about to come gushing out, but I knew if I let them, then there would be NO stopping them.  She is super sweet and runs with me to the end of mile one while pushing her 7 month old in his stroller, I couldn't have asked for a better friend.  She then sprinted a head of me and held up a sign for me:

She clearly knows how my runs go. And she was partially right, the first mile was hard. My right calf was bugging me and so was the bottoms of my feet.  But shortly after mile one the pain went away. I wouldn't say it was all down hill from there, but the pain had gone away. Thank you Kayla for surprising the hell out of me and making me cry.  But mostly thank you for being a GREAT friend!!

The rest of the run was difficult for me. Not that the course itself was hard, pretty flat for the most part. And the wind was difficult at times, but what really made it difficult was the fact that I couldn't really let myself zone out. I couldn't get lost in the music or the pavement. I was constantly looking around and watching other people. For one thing, I had NO idea where I was going.  I tried looking at the course map before the race and it was just too confusing. And then there were water stations set up almost every mile and that threw me off too.  I knew I didn't need any water for the first half and I did good to not drink anything.  I think it was mile 7 that I finally had my first drink of water. But then after that I wanted to drink water at every station and I knew that was unnecessary.

I know around mile 8 I was wondering if I could finish this thing. I had 5 more miles to go and I was getting tired. But you know what kept me going?? It was the volunteers at the water stations they usually had cute kids there to hand out water, oranges, or bananas. They were so full of energy and excitement, they really made the difference for me. Then there were complete strangers cheering you on. Those people tugged at my heart.  They didn't know me and they were up at the crack of dawn to cheer on the runners.  They could have sat down or left after their loved ones ran by, but no they stayed and cheered on the others. It was very sweet and motivating. So I kept running.

My mom also called my phone from time to time to tell me to keep running.  My dad had to work that day and so I knew they wouldn't be there to cheer me on, but my mom made sure to let me know that she was still cheering me on from afar. She is AWESOME. So that helped too.  All the text messages helped as well. THANK YOU EVERYONE!

Mile 10 hit and I was struggling.  I kept telling myself that I had a SHORT 3 miles left, but I was struggling. I didn't want to stop at ALL during the last 3 miles, but I had to. My hips started to hurt and I was tired. So I would walk for about 10-20 seconds and then I would run again and then walk when I NEEDED it.

The last mile was the hardest.  I wanted to stop and call it quits. I was mentally and physically done. But something deep inside me told me to keep going.  I knew Jed, R, and Kayla would be at the finish line and there wasn't anything stopping me from seeing them over than myself.  So I pushed forward.

Right before I got to the finish line I heard a voice say "Your almost there, Keep running." I knew that voice, I had heard that voice a MILLION times before.  I heard that voice when I was playing basketball, volleyball, soccer, track.  I heard that voice when I was sick, tired, happy, and sad. It was my mom's voice!! She surprised me and was THERE.  I couldn't believe it. I started to cry ONCE again. LOL And then my son came out and said, "Mommy!!!" and that little guy ran with me over the finish line. It was one of the best feelings in the WORLD. 

 

 

I finished!! I ran (slowly jogged is a better word) 13.1 miles. And I have to say it was the hardest thing I have ever done other than giving birth to my son. But I am so glad I did it!! I am a runner and I can achieve what ever goal I put my mind to.  I know this now. I have friends and family members who will support me during these tough times and will be there to push me through them.

So what now?? What is the next thing on my agenda?? Not sure yet.  Someone asked me if I would run another half marathon and my answer at that moment was NO. I was done. But time has passed since then and I am ready to think about my next race and I'm about 90% sure that I will run another half marathon this year if not 2. Someone also asked me if I wanted to run a FULL marathon and the answer to that one was NO and it is still No. 26.2 miles is a LONG ass way. For those that ran 26.2 miles on Saturday, YOU ARE MY HERO. I don't know how they did it. Because when I got to the finish line I knew I was done, but the Full Marathoners had to TURN AROUND and run that route AGAIN! Kill me now! It was crazy to see those people turn around and head back. But they do inspire me. So maybe one day I will run a FULL marathon, but until then I'm perfectly content on working on running my next half a marathon faster and stronger.

This morning I woke up and one of the first things I thought about was running. It is in me, I am not going to fight it. So a couple times a week I am going to hit the road and run. And when the time is right I will train for another Half Marathon, but until then, I am going to run for enjoyment because I. AM. A. RUNNER.

My jams

So I asked you guys (oh and gals) earlier to send me your jams or your favorite songs. And you didn't disappoint.  Thank you for helping me. I got some REALLY good ones. So without further adieu here is my list (as of now):

• Best Day of My Life - American Authors 
• Make Some Noise - Beastie Boys 
• No Sleep Till Brooklyn - Beastie Boys 
• Drunk in Love - Beyonce'
• Somewhere In Brooklyn - Bruno Mars
• Marry You - Bruno Mars
• Play Hard - David Guetta Play Hard (feat. Ne-Yo & Akon)
• 'Till I Collapse - Eminem & Nate Dogg The Eminem
• We Are Young -Fun. 
• Soldier - Gavin DeGraw 
• You Can Do It - Ice Cube 
• On Top of the World - Imagine Dragons 
• Talk Dirty - Jason Derulo 
• Roar - Katy Perry 
• Ain't No Mountain High Enough - Marvin Gay & Tammi Terrell
• Party In the U.S.A. - Miley Cyrus Party In the U.S.A. 
• Hey Ya! - OutKast Speakerboxxx 
• Nine In the Afternoon - Panic! At the Disco Pretty. 
• Don't Stop the Party - (feat. TJR)  Pitbull 
• Shake Senora - (feat. T-Pain & Sean Paul) Pitbull
• Renegades of Funk - Rage Against the Machine 
• Killing In the Name - Rage Against the Machine Rage 
• Can't Remember to Forget You -  (feat. Rihanna) Shakira Shakira. 
• Why Can't We Be Friends - Smash Mouth 
• Wobble -  V.I.C.
• Clouds - Zach Sobiech 
• Switch  - Will Smith 
• Call Me Maybe - Carly Rae Jepsen 
• Love You Madly - Cake 
• Watching You Watch Him - Eric Hutchinson 
• One of These Days -  FFH 
• You Can Do It - Ice Cube Ice Cube
• On Top of the World - Imagine Dragons 
• Good Time - Owl City & Carly Rae Jepsen 
• Best Day of My Life - American Authors 
• Levels -  (Skrillex Remix) Avicii 
• Eye of the Tiger - Survivor Eye of the Tiger 
• Right Now -  Van Halen 
• Work B**ch - Britney Spears 
• Fishin' In the Dark - Nitty Gritty Dirt Band Fishin' In the Dark 
• Happy -  Pharrell Williams 
• We Can't Stop - Miley Cyrus Bangerz 
• No Diggity - Blackstreet & Dr. Dre
• Soul Singing - The Black Crowes 
• Pardon Me - Incubus Make 
• Everybody Talks - Neon Trees Picture Show 

There It is kids! (oh by the way, some of these are NOT kid friendly so please listen to it first before you jam it in the minivan full of kiddos).

You are looking at his list thinking, man she likes a lot of different stuff, it isn't all from the same genre.  You are right.  I can't listen to strictly hip hop for 2 1/2 hours or alternative for 2 1/2 hours. And some of them don't have the best beat but they have HUGE meaning to me.  For example:

• Clouds by Zach Sobiech, this song always makes me think of my Cousin Abby. She past away a couple of years ago due to Kidney Cancer. But this song always makes me smile and think of her. This song WILL ALWAYS BE ON MY PLAY LIST!
• Why Can't We Be Friends by Smash Mouth makes me think of my friend Emily from high school. Just good memories of us jamming out to this in her car.
• Eye of the Tiger  by Survivor Eye of the Tiger makes me think of Rocky which makes me think of my Dad.  We have both seen that movie too many times to count. Good movie, Good song, Good memories. :)
• One of These Days by FFH makes me think of TEC (Teens Encounter Christ).  I LOVE this song. and it makes me think of so many GREAT people. Those people helped shape me into the person I am today.
• Pardon Me by Incubus makes me think of Jed. It was one of the first songs he told me I HAD TO DOWNLOAD in college.  He was right, it was my favorite song for a long time.
• Levels a (Skrillex Remix) by Avicii  makes me think of Jed, he likes Skrillex and listens to them in the barn a lot.
• 'Till I Collapse by Eminem & Nate Dogg The Eminem is just a good song to keep me going, one step at a time.
• Fishin' In the Dark by Nitty Gritty Dirt Band was added because it is one of friends favorite songs. She knows I'm talking about her!! :)

Some of the meanings I am going to keep to myself. Just because. But I do want to say thank you to everyone who suggested something.  I was suggested "Let it go" which is from Frozen and I have to say it is a good song, but wasn't a good song to run to.  I haven't seen the movie so I am thinking after that I might feel differently. I was also recommended any song by Cannibal Corpse and that stuff is HARD CORE, BUT I found that it wasn't that bad.  In fact I found myself listening to it while I worked. ODD I KNOW! But I wasn't sure it would make a good running music, so I may have to experiment with it at a later date.

I feel like I learned a lot about some of you when asking you about songs. And I found some music that I didn't know about. So thank you! I do have some songs that I need to listen to that was suggested by sister in law that I know I will like , but I just haven't had the time to listen to them. So I might add some to this list. But I think I have about 3 hours worth of music and with that said, I BETTER NOT HEAR ALL OF THIS MUSIC. I should be done around the 2 1/2 hour mark.

I am starting to get butterflies in my stomach, but I'm also excited for tomorrow. I will have my phone on me and if you feel compelled to text me or call me during the race, PLEASE do so.  I can have Siri check my text messages while I have my headphones on or I can talk while I am running. The race starts at 7:00 AM CST (I think most of you are in KS, but just in case) and I should be done around 9:30 (let's hope). I am serious when I say, please contact me during the race because I have a feeling that any encouragement will HELP me cross that finish line.

If you follow me on Facebook or instagram I will do my best to post pictures before and after the race. Now I just need to hydrate and eat well until then. Which shouldn't be a problem because tomorrow is ALL I can think about!!

Have a good weekend folks. And wish me luck!

I can call myself a runner now

HELLO Monday! Ugh. I'm not feeling it today. I could have used another day. How about you??

Yesterday I slowly jogged 10 miles. And for the most part during this whole long journey I haven't really considered myself a runner. This might sound weird to some people, but I run when I want to and only when I'm in the mood for it. I usually run as far as I want to or to literally get me back home. I also use running to clear my head and to burn some calories. So what do I consider a runner? Good Question, I don't really have an answer to that.  I just didn't consider myself a runner.  But yesterday things changed. Normally I look forward to my long runs and I get excited about how far I can run and having that set amount of time to MYSELF. During these runs I usually let my mind wander to where ever it wants to. Normally it ends up reminiscing about the wonderful people in my life. I think about my friend and high school friends and the memories that I hold dear to me.  I think about people that I haven't talked to lately and wonder what they are up to now. But a lot of times my thoughts belong to the people who have pasted, people who have left this earth.  I know this sounds creepy, but this is when I feel the most connected to them. And I LIKE this feeling. It feels like they are near, like I can pick up the phone and call them.  I think about the good times I had with them and sometimes the regrets I have. But for the most part they are all good memories, you know the ones that make you laugh out loud and if you are in public you might be a little embarrassed for laughing so hard by yourself.

this is normally how they go.

 

Yesterday was a different story. I had been dreading this run since the middle of the week.  I kept telling myself that I only had ONE more long run before my race. But I just couldn't wrap my head around it. I couldn't get excited about it. I have no idea why.

off subject - but I really love this movie!! I have been wanting to use this quote for a long time.

 

So Friday night comes and I decide to indulge in a couple beers. I deserved it.  But in the back of my head I kept thinking, just a couple because you need to be drinking water to get ready for your run tomorrow. But a couple turned into 4 which then turned into, crap I have no idea how many beers I drank on Friday.  The point being, I drank too much. So come Saturday morning I was in no shape to run.  I was upset with myself, but I think I did it on purpose.  I didn't want to run that stupid 10 miles anyways, I think I subconsciously ruined my plans for running.

So this left Sunday to run. I still didn't want to, I basically waited until the last minute to run. And the moment came to were I had to lace up my running shoes or call it a day.  What did I end up doing?? I laced up those darn shoes. I told myself that I would go and run THREE little miles and if I didn't feel like running after that then I would come home and relax.

Of course the 1st mile was a struggle to get through. I hate the 1st mile. But after the 1st mile I thought my sweet spot would kick in soon, but it NEVER did. So I made myself run the 2nd mile, still convinced I would quit at mile 3. But then mile 3 came and I had a decision to make. Either keep going or stop and walk home. Then this thought came to me "what if I run these 10 miles and it just isn't a good run, but I finish it?" And then I thought "What if you don't finish the 10 miles and just head home right now?" I really didn't have an answer to the first question. But the second one I knew the answer to.  I would fret about the 10 miles I didn't run and I would be VERY nervous the night before my race because all I would think about are the miles I DID NOT run. So I pulled up my granny panties and I took a right which would lead me to my 7 remaining miles.

How were those remaining 7 miles?? They were still as bad as the first 3.  I had to push myself continually to run. I even prayed for rain, and not because I can't handle a little rain, but because at that point I would call it a day because I didn't want my expensive Iphone to get wet. I would call Jed and have him pick me up, simple as that. But I never got it. I got sprinkled on, but nothing my phone cover couldn't protect. DAMN. So I kept running. I would stop from time to time to walk for about 30 seconds and then I would start back up. And then I finally finish that HORRIBLE 10 miles, but when everything was said and done, I was proud of myself for running. I wasn't proud of my time or my distance, I was proud that I push through that 10 miles even when I didn't want to.

 

Oh and you should add 10 minutes to that time because my stupid phone paused my workout. It kept logging the distance, but not the time. I am telling you, nothing was going my way for this run.



So am I ready for this weekend?? Ummmm, I think so.  I don't think I am going to be any more ready than I am right now. I won't run the rest of the week, I will go to crossfit tomorrow, Wednesday, and possibly on Thursday, but that is it. But even if I don't complete the race or for some CRAZY reason sleep through my 3-4 alarms on Saturday, I will still call myself a runner.  I thought completing this race would make me a runner, but yesterday is what made me realize I am runner. I pushed through the hard stuff. I didn't just run when I wanted to or when it made me happy.  I ran because I have a goal and the only way to reach that goal was to run on a day I didn't feel like it. And I won't fret about it either this week.  I ran a hard 10 miles in dirt, gravel, and pavement. Those ten miles also included some difficult hills. So I think I'm ready for a flat course that involves only pavement.

What I do need help with is some MUSIC.  What is your jam right now?? Seriously people, I need some new tunes. It can be fast, slow, country, hip hop, rap, etc. I am going to share my playlist on Friday, but this last weekend my run outlasted my music. So I need more music. HELP!! Plus I like music that makes me think of my friends, so give me a song that will help me think of you while I run on Saturday. I do tend to like something with a good beat to it, but with that said when you see my list on Friday you will realize that I do have a few that are a little slower. Please don't leave me hanging, any contribution is VERY MUCH APPRECIATED!

Come on, you know there is a song that makes you want to do this.  Give it up, I want to know!

 

Have a good week folks. I know I will still be pretty nervous towards the end of the week, but at least I know I have done everything I can up until this point.  I even ran when I didn't want to!